Wednesday, November 7, 2007

enter the future

follow this link for an introduction of the story.

The year is 2078. VIKAS BALLAL is turning evil. ARJUN SRIVASTAV the chief scientist being VIKAS’s right hand marches along with his organtic creations.

4 scientists working for CSIO labs get a common dream .A phenomenon ‘PH XXX’!!. Driven by the dream they decide to march against VIKAS’s evil designs. These scientists are RUMAN iyer, SUSHEN acharya, VASU odeyon and VISHWA pandit.

A spy organtic smells foul and detects the secret meeting of the four scientists. They were discussing the phenomenon PH XXX!! and plan a strategic procedure regarding the development of a super powered organtic inspired by the dream of PARASURAM. The spy attacks the scientists and RUMAN iyer is captured the rest manage to escape. RUMAN iyer is tortured to reveal the designs but he succumbs with loud voice ‘PARASURAM!!!!’

The spy reports this to VIKAS & team. They are confused by the term ‘PARASURAM’ and a special team is deployed on a research .

Meanwhile the 3 scientists SUSHEN acharya, VASU odeyon and VISHWA pandit disguise themselves and break apart in search for the relics of PARASURAM.

VISHWA pandit comes across the subterranean slum and happens to meet BHAGAVATR an exponent of ancient Indian philosophy and mystics. He is supposed to be the grand father of SHIREENYA. SUSHEN acharya finds the ‘TRIPURA RAHASYA’ and VASU odeyon finds the ATHARVA VEDA (has references of lethal weapons)and DHANURVEDA. (The science of weapons supposed to be first taught to PARASURAMA by Lord SHIVA). All the 3 scientists meet up in the subterranean slum which is suddenly attacked by the organtics under speculation of the presence of the scientists. BHAGAVATR is killed in an explosion minutes after handing over the relics to scientists SHIREENYA is left orphaned.

After a nail biting escape the scientists find themselves in a strange island.(yet to be explained) The island is a newly formed island in the LAKSHADWEEP archipelago, yet to be discovered or detected. LAKSADWEEP archipelago was formed during the eruption occurred when PARASURAM wield his powerful ax which struck the earth’s core releasing molten. This area remains active and generates islands time on time.

The scientists begin their intensive research and create a female organtic .RENUKA A8. which can procreate an super organtic when a sperma cored organtic cell is introduced. Unfortunately they fail in their attempts to create this sperma cored organtic cell.

Meanwhile in CSIO labs a powerful organtic with its ability to produce sperma cored organtic cell is developed. JAMADAGNEE 3. They are yet to develop a female organtic which can create a super demon organtic rendering CSIO the most powerful labs to overpower the earth.

The presence of the new island is detected and the organtic forces headed by JAMADAGNEE 3 is deployed there for a thorough search .

JAMADAGNEE 3 and troops find out the hiding of the scientists and attacks. During the attack JAMADAGNEE 3 encounters RENUKA A8 . RENUKA A8 has its special decoding ability which can alter the programs of similar organtics. JAMADAGNEE 3 gets decoded and functions against its own troops. The whole troop is terminated. The destroyed organtics emits signals to lab which in turn successfully patch up the coding of JAMADAGNEE 3 .

JAMADAGNEE 3 emits harmful radiation making the scientists paralysed. JAMADAGNEE 3 encounters RENUKA A8 again now newly programmed to treacherously destroy RENUKA A8 after rendering it procreative. Sperma cored organtic cell is released into RENUKA A8.

Sperma cored organtic cell reacts with the procreative cell of RENUKA A8. During this there happens a divine phenomenon.

KALKI the avatar of kalyug is set to incarnate . Before this, it sends a portion of the incarnation for the preparing the right circumstances for the great descent.

KALKI the kalyug avatar is said to incarnate to destroy the complete human race. In this time period every human turns into asura creating evil powered organisms. So Lord Visnu incarnates as KALKI to wipe off these asuric humans from the face of the earth . Then it destroys the earth itself to create a new one. KALKI will be incarnating in a organtic prototype created by the asuric humans rather than humans. This turns the organtics against their creators itself destroying them.

KALKI’s portion incarnates in to the hybrid prototype of RENUKA A8 to create conducive circumstances in the era of organtics for the great descent.


JAMADAGNEE 3 turns this hybrid against against RENUKA A8. RENUKA A8 is destroyed . Now JAMADAGNEE 3 transfers special powers to hybrid rendering its divine portion active. This divine being more powerful than JAMADAGNEE 3 permanently decodes it which in turn brings back RENUKA A8 and the scientists to normal.

Now the scientists start experimenting on the hybrid unknowing its divine content. They arrive at a conclusion that there is missing portion in it, which is a human gene, when introduced into hybrid turns it into a complete controllable super powerful organtic which they assume to be equivalent to PARASURAM.

They develop a gene detector which is programmed to detect that particular gene which can create the super organtic. This is deployed to search for the gene, eventually landing in a strange and rare island .

This island is actually a portion of another planet where the Chiranjeevi PARASURAM is leaving!!.

Planets have different life cycles for egs; one day in Jupiter is x number of earth days . So the belief that PARASURAM has a long lifespan is supported by the theory that He discards the earthly body to get trans muted to another planet continuing his life.

On the call of the divine Chiranjeevi PARASURAM is transmuted back to earth in that strange and rare island. But PARASURAM is at verge of completing his life cycle on that particular island and to be trans muted to another.

The gene detector identifies the gene in Chiranjeevi PARASURAM and gets it just before Chiranjeevi PARASURAM leaves the body.

Meanwhile the KALKI portion gets to know the success of the gene detector. Divine duty is to destroy the evil and the seeds of the same. So if the scientists could create the super organtic they would be invincible eventually turning them demoniac.

The phenomenon PH XXX reoccurs in the scientists where they are informed they were the reincarnations of PARSURAMA’s brothers. Now they had to sacrifice themselves making way for the divine. In reward they will be trans muted to higher regions.

The divine hybrid then dutifully kills the scientists . The gene detector introduces the human gene strand into the partly divine hybrid . Thus

PARASURAM A.X.e is formed.

The CSIO labs deploys special troops to destroy JAMADAGNEE 3. They are successful. JAMADAGNEE 3 is destroyed due to which RENUKA A8 degenerates. Thus PARASURAMA A. X.e begins his termination campaign against VIKAS BALLAL’s designs. Thus the REVIVAL

1 comment:

pravish said...

i went through your story, i appriciate the effort you have put in it. nice to know that you are building upon the thread that we discussed earlier. your imagination has started to accelerate,
but i need to caution you that you are pumping your imagination too much, this can lead to disasters (trust me,i have experienced it). i say this because i have found some serious problems with your storyline -

when i finished reading your story i experienced the same effect that i had when i read some sci-fi novels long back(It put me in a state of confusion). But then thats ok since this is your first draft copy attempt at a story, and all good things starts from garbage.

i found out that you still are not keeping in mind who your readers are, for if your readers are going to be kids, then try to keep your story line and characters simple.try to find out wat children love in comic books and wat there tastes are.

The second problem i found in your story was the rendering itself. i still dont have any idea about how big your comic book is going to be, the appearence of your main character into your story depends on it. you have tried to feed the readers with all the myths of your character.i also found that you were desperate to put in all the character names that you have learnt from your research of parasuram. this has complicated the story line and also has taken away the beauty of the rendering.

i would sujest you to take an alternate approach werein-

stick to simple story line as previously discussed or something better you have felt ( even if its incomplete its ok ). stick to only few characters simple enough for the reader to digest. let all your focus be on your central character and his opponnent. try to visualise your story this can help you identify the flow and how creatively best rendering you can provide to it. if you have got the rendering perfected for the small story line that you have created then we can build upon it more and more and see how it works out.

also on my part am thinkin on building up the story that i had said earlier. i will send it to you as soon as it is completed.

* And finally all that i have said is my personal opinion do consult to others before coming to a desicion on how to move forward from here.